Sunday, April 13, 2008
Thoughts on "Metallic Taste"
Memory works in peculiar ways. While the main parts of "The Metallic Taste" did happen, (I got a bloody nose, Mike did say "body, body body," I did spar with Tong and Fabian) there are things that didn't happen. I didn't think that Fabian wanted to be a nose model. I did wonder why he was wearing a headpiece with a face guard. When writing about it I decided it would be funny if he did it as he wanted to be a nose model. Later on in life I bet I'll think I actually did think that he did want to be a nose model at the time. In rewriting the events, I'll probably have changed my memory.
Our capacity to forget is a good thing. It is our capacity to forget that allows us to overcome the injuries done to us. If we remembered every injury wouldn't we end up being entrapped in ressentiment forever? Forever playing the role of the victim? Not only is forgetting a good thing but the ability to change the way in which we interpret our past, which I'm alluding to above, is a positive trait. We can change our lives from "this happened" into "I willed this."
Anyways about the story... I want to write more stories about boxers (Muay Thai and western) but find creating much emotional depth difficult. The depth of boxers is in their motion, in their action. Its hard for me to express my emotions, but they are there in my punches, in my feet hitting the pavement when I do my roadwork, in the breaths I let out, and the blows I let in. There is a depth that is understated, that is salient, that is experienced but goes unspoken.
Maybe the problem is that you can't write with boxing gloves on.